I just talked to a friend who is a wonderful mom. She has a precious 3 year old and is doing a good job being his mom. She has a wonderful idea I want to share. Most of us reading this will be familiar with the term naughty spot, time out chair for misbehavior or the term you chose to use.
Her son has a place that he is sent when he is in trouble for a short period of time. The naughty spot is a place to sit when he has chosen to misbehave. A good place for the naughty spot is the kitchen because mom can watch him. The naughty spot in the kitchen allows mom more freedom to walk away while insisting he obey. This is especially true when he is whining and crying to wear mom down so he does not have to obey.
This child also needs a place where he can go to calm down when he is not in trouble. He can become over excited and need to calm down. Someone suggested that it could be the same spot. This mom realized that she did not want him to think he was in trouble if he just needed help to calm down. Therefore the two could not be the same place or even in the same room.
The calm down corner is to help him learn to calm down when he becomes overwhelmed. Mom asks if he needs to go to the calm down corner when she notices he is getting upset. He will say yes and mom tells him to come to her when he is ready. He controls when he can leave the calm down corner. The calm down corner is in the living room where the parents are the most. She does something in the living room so he can see her and be secure.
How often do we give a child mixed signals when we are trying to help them?
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